I am Spinning Mum

​Ok My Pretties…

S-Mum has taken her head out of the clouds and has arrived back in reality with a thud.
I spent much of today smiling and just DELIGHTED with me wee self and I was a complete saddo who couldn’t stop flicking open the back page of the rather FABLIS magazine to see my wee family’s daft faces staring back at me.

 It was wonderful.

I enjoyed it. 😍
And then, Mini-Me decided to stick a dirty big pin in my inflated arse and bring me back to my rightful place. 

MAMMY HELL.
Bedtime was particularly fun tonight.  It was like a chapter from the Hunger Games with dark fogs and crazed rabid monsters and insufferable screams and unintelligible grunts.  
Mini-Me, high on sugar from eating the icing off the Him’s birthday cupcakes while I wasn’t paying attention, decided to SPIN.
SPINNING AND SPINNING AND SPINNING…

AROUND AND AROUND with me shouting “WILL YOU STOP SPINNING BEFORE YOU HURT YOURSELF,”

and “OK, It’s CHILL OUT TIME NOW!” and all sorts of futile orders at her.
Sure, she couldn’t hear me. 

She was SPINNING!

Stooooopid Mammy.
And then, she spun head first ONTO the floor and INTO Princess’s HEAD.
Right in front of me…in slow motion…and there was FECK ALL I could do to save their respective skulls!

Bang…pause…SCREAM…😲😲😲😲

Mini-Me because she’d bumped her head AND she knew she was also 98% likely to be in trouble…

Princess because she’d been reaching for the remote control and had SUDDENLY been headbutted out of the way.
Screams…in perfect synchronisation and impressive harmony.πŸ‘­

I got them calmed down (They’re both fine btw) and we EVENTUALLY made it to the JOYFUl “getting to the bedtime”.
Can you put on your PJs please? 

 Goes to toilet.

Can you go into the bathroom and get your toothbrush please?

 Goes to bedroom.

Wash your hands?

 Decides to cycle her bike to “park it in the kitchen.” 😑😑
And so it went on until Mammy lost the fricken PLOT and Herself decided she probably SHOULD listen to Mammy.  (You know, because a bumped head 20 minutes earlier didn’t teach her ANYTHING!)
Cue Sweet eyes and “Can I have 2 stories my bestest wee Mammy Bear?”

(Can you hell…)

“No.  One story tonight.”
I have to teach her that she has to listen.

I will stand my ground.

I won’t give in.

I read.

And then I realise that this is the first time she’s listened to me since 5pm.

And it’s so relaxing and nice, that I read her two.
And then I kiss her goodnight on her stubborn wee head and go to the kitchen. And I want to bang MY HEAD off the wall!

Because I’m spinning too. And sometimes I think that if I stop Spinning, I’ll also fall down and bump my head. πŸ˜‰πŸ˜‰
Time for a cuppa.

Hope your bedtimes were peaceful and bump free. πŸ˜ͺπŸ˜ͺ

And thank you all for the lovely messages today.
I am Spinning Mum. 😘😘

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