Holy Jemima…where did that go?
I’ve just tucked you in after your special day. You’re creamcrackered and tucked up between your new Trolls dolls, so I’m guessing that there’ll be no sleep for the next hour or so anyway.
It’s been a busy day, filled with fun and family and presents and cake.
Mammy did her very best to make it perfect.
To make it memorable.
To make you have the most wonderful day ever.
This birthday is particularly important to Mammy. Why? Because I remember when I turned 5. I remember it vividly. It’s probably one of my clearest early memories.
I remember wakening up that morning and just KNOWING that it was a big deal. I was 5. Finally. I was the SAME age as my two best friends. The same age as my cousin Karen. And more importantly, I was FINALLY older than your uncle Danny again! It was really annoying being the same age as him for 3 weeks each year.
Being 5 fixed that. 😂
I had made it. I was 5. I remember Granda saying “Where’s my big 5 year old?”, and hugging me, (just like your Daddy did you this morning), and feeling sooooooo grown up.
I remember getting a Nurse’s costume and a little Nurse’s set and I decided there and then I would be a Nurse when I grew up. That changed. And that’s OK. You’ll change your mind too. Today, you want to be a farmer and a Superhero. You can do whatever you want to be.
Because you’re brilliant.
I remember having 3 friends come over after school for cake. I remember Granny and Granda coming for tea. I remember going to bed that night, wondering what would happen tomorrow, now that I was the grand old age of 5. I remember thinking that it had been the best birthday ever…
Because it was.
I don’t remember anything else, except the good things.
I’m sure there were squabbles. I’m sure I was told off once or twice. I’m sure there were moments of that perfect day that were normal and ordinary and maybe even crappy, but my memory (with the help of my mum and dad) only allowed the happy to stay in my mind.
And I hope and pray that this will be the same for you, when you look back on YOUR 5th birthday someday. 💖
And I hope that you are as lucky as your Mammy has been to have your own little buddy by then.
And that you too try to make her 5th birthday a happy one.
Because I did try. And I hope I succeeded.
I even tried extra hard to NOT scold or give out to you because it’s your birthday. I did OK. Yes, we had that wee row before bedtime. But I’ve already said I’m sorry and that I love you and tried to explain that you have to TRY to listen to me sometimes. I know I shouldn’t have scolded on your special day, but Mammy is sometimes quite terrible and grumpy and needs a kick up the arse. And believe me, Mammy felt quite shitty afterwards. It’s OK though, because we had a talk and a cuddle and read a story and talked about the day you were born and I’ve told you all the things I love about you, so I hope that has helped you go to bed knowing that I love you so much it sometimes hurts. 😥
Because I do.💖💖
I love your face, your beautiful eyes, your little nose, those rosebud lips, your voice, your gangly limbs, your humour, your wit and that kind and sensitive little heart which I try every day to strengthen and build up, although sometimes I feel like I do nothing but break it.
And someday, you’ll be a Mammy too and you’ll understand exactly what I mean.
You’ve had a nice day. You’ve felt like you’re the centre of the universe for a day. And even your sister being sick and grumpiful all afternoon didn’t upset you did it?
Because you won’t remember that anyway will you?
Because with her, all you see is love and fun.
And I hope that lasts forever.
Because this 👇👇👇 THIS little birthday hug right here👇👇👇, is all that matters in the world, to you, to her and to us.
You’re never too old for that. 💖💖
Happy birthday my Mini-Me
You Mamma Bear x