I am Shopsy Mum

Posted in blog, parenting, treats, wine by

​Well feck-it-up Friday was FABLIS!
Today’s Mummy wins were:

1.  Keeping everyone in one piece, fed and entertained.

2. Not getting puked on.

3. Princess SLEPT for the 2 hours we were shopping.  And No, I didn’t put wine in her bottle. 🤗

4.  Only making very animated faces behind Mini-Me’s back 3 times before bed.  😲

5. Getting same Little Miss “I DON’T LIIIIIIIIKE CHICKEN!” to eat a big bowl of CHICKEN by blitzing it up with bolognese sauce, calling it LAVA and pouring it over a pasta VOLCANO! Oh, and calling it Secret recipe lava helped.  She DEMOLISHED it! 😂👇👇👇👇👇👇

In fairness, the only thing I fecked up today was my credit card. 💳💳💳
I went to McElhinneys with my Mamma Bear and accidentally fell into some clothes.
I got a few bargains actually…a few teachery type bits to make me feel a bit of fab when I mix them with the old faithfuls from Penneys! #penneysbest
Then I ACCIDENTALLY bumped into the Chanel Counter and I felt SOOOOO bad that I had to buy shiny tiny little black boxes filled with shiny tiny but very FABLIS little pots and bottles. 

 (Sssssh! The Him🕵does Not need to know this.  It’s our secret K?)
S-Mum shall face the HELL of going back to reality with a shiny “Chaneled” face and smelling of aromatic floral bouquets of very spensive orchids and peonies or pee-the-beds or whatever.
It’s all still sitting in the little tiny bag on the bed because the packaging is WAY too exciting to open just yet.

Seriously, that little white bag has SERIOUS magic powers.

It really has helped me to feel better about going back to work. (And not just because I am going to need wages again to pay for it!) 😂 
I know I’m supposed to say things like “The only jewels I need around my neck are my children’s”, and “The prettiest thing a mum can wear is a smile or her baby or whatever.”

But sorry Ladybelles.

Feck that…
Sometimes I NEED the tiny roped handles of a tiny but crisp and structured white bag with one little word in divine black font around my wrist.

AND nice smelly creams can REALLY help with the pretty!

 I SWEAR I look 10 years younger ALREADY and I haven’t even opened it yet!
Now, speaking of aromatic floral bouquets, Shiraz or Merlot? 🍷🍷🍷
Share your Mammy Wins today? Or go ahead and tell me how you Fecked-it-up! 
I am SHOPSY MUM!

😍😍😍

#SMum #mcelhinneys #ballybofey #mammyheaven #chanel #sprayme #regretittomorrow

I am She cracks me up Mum 

Posted in blog, children, family by

​I am She cracks me up Mum.
Mini-Me before bed: “Mammy, What did the witto children in Afwica do when St. Patwick was chasing the snakes away?”
Me: 

Absolute silence…

(I was trying to figure out if this was a serious question or a joke she’d heard somewhere, in which case I’d have been wondering WHO the HECK I would have to be bollocking about such subject matter for conversation with a 4 year old?)
Mini-Me Me: “Mammy, what did the witto children…”
Me: (because I couldn’t actually think of ANYTHING to answer her with) “I don’t know Sweetie.  Do you want two stories tonight because you’ve been such a good girl?” 
Mini-Me: “YAY!”
Mammy win.

Distraction rocks… (Some might say BRIBERY…I will stick with DISTRACTION.) 
She is a funny little thing.😍😍

When asked today at camp what she wanted her face painted as, her reply was apparently “Elsa and the Hulk.”

Now, I pride myself on NOT allowing gender differentiation to be a factor in our home.  The girls have tractors and football and we’re all about the Superheroes.

Either I’m doing a wonderful job or I’m raising a badtempered, violent Princess.

We’ll see…

Regardless, she came home as a giraffe! 🐆

It was adorable.

However, there is now yellow facepaint EVERYWHERE and I can’t get it off properly so she has gone to bed looking like a jaundiced minion. 😂😂😂
SO, she is FUNNY, but also very ASSERTIVE and POLITE.
On Monday night, Granda was turning hay in the field next door after she’d gone to bed. I told her he’d be finished soon and to go back to sleep.

 On Tuesday morning, this 👇👇👇👇👇👇👇 was stuck to the inside of her bedroom window.


I didn’t take much notice really, thinking it was a note to her fairy.  She loves blutack and writes on everything.  (I was just glad she hadn’t written on the glass. 😅)
This morning The Him 🕵asked her what it was.
It says “Dear Granda.  NO FARMING AFTER BEDTIME. Thank you!”
Poor Granda was busting himself to literally ‘make hay while the sun shines’, but Madam Moralknickers had other ideas.

Well she’s polite if a bit bossy! 😂😍😍
I may have to start buying presents 🍷 for her new teacher…

Bribery?  

How dare you…it’s simply Distraction! 

😂😂
#SMum

I am Seriously technologically stooopid Mum

Posted in Uncategorized by

My brain is MUSH.
Sticky, messy, useless MUSH.💩
It took me an hour to figure out how to put the links for the voting into a post.  

Thanks to a lovely S-Mum who sent me a message with simple Silly-Mummy step-by-step instructions on how to personalise the links. I hope I’ve (she’s) made it a bit easier to cast your votes.
 It seems that although I THINK I’m computer literate, being able to navigate Bookface and Instagranny (really badly I may add…) doesn’t quite cut it.  


And the Tweeter freaks the Twit out of me.  I use it at a distance.  I literally stay as far away from the screen as possible because I’m afraid someone is going to DESTROY me for mistagging or accidentally retweeting their tweetering?
Mini-Me can work the tellybox better than I can and Princess will no doubt be able to teach me all I need to know about such stuff in approximately 3 years.

Which might be handy because apparently Bloggers are in tune with all of this stuff.  They talk about linkies and hashtags and all sorts of terrifying things and I’m standing here watching in awe, like the kid in the playground who doesn’t have a mobile.🙃🙃
I’m still proud of myself for being able to use the fricken washing machine without having to call my Mum. 

 I get SUCH a sense of ACHIEVEMENT when I know I need to change the settings from a 40° to a 60° wash. I figured that one out all by myself.

  I am a proper, bonafide and very mature, grown-up Domestic Goddess, thank you.
Just bow before me and call me Supermum…(but don’t you Dare ask me what ANY of the other settings are!) 😂
So while the REAL blogger types on the Shortlist that I fell onto by mistake, get their Tweetsickle and Snappychat on, I’ll stay here, safe and cozy in my Bookface corner, where all I really have to do is type my random S-mumblings and hit publish. 
 And if I get stuck, I’ll ask Mini-Me to help me, or I’ll follow Princess’s example and hide behind the curtains.

👇👇👇👇👇👇👇👇👇

Thanks to everyone who has taken the time to vote and to share, and Cheers to all of the lovely comments.

You really are a FABLIS bunch of S-Mummies. 💖💖💖💖
#SMum 😘😘😘

Here are quick linkies to my vote pages.
http://bit.ly/VoteSecretsofSMum

http://bit.ly/Voteshakeabootay

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Xxx

I am Seeking Votes Mum

Posted in blog, children, parenting by

​Hi Ladybelles and Superdads!
It’s VOTING TIME!
If you click on either of the links below, it will bring you to the voting pages for my entries.
I’ve been shortlisted in two categories 

1. Best Blog Post  as    “I am Shake-a-bootay Mum”.

2. Parenting Blog   as   “Secrets of S-Mum”
You simply need to enter your name, email address and a password to make your vote.   


https://blogawardsireland.secure-platform.com/a/gallery/rounds/17/details/8624
https://blogawardsireland.secure-platform.com/a/gallery/rounds/17/details/8452
It really only takes a few seconds and I’d be SO over the moon if you could vote for me.
And if you’d be so kind as to share, I’ll raise a big huge “cheers” to you if and when I ever get around to having that celebratory grapejuice!

Thanks in advance.

(Voting closes on the 23rd.)
S-Mum 😘😘😘


#LWIbloggies2016 #SMum #bestparentingblog #bestblogpost

I am SHORTLISTED Mum!

Posted in children, parenting, toddlers, wine by

​WELL SLAP MY ARSE and SHAKE IT AT THE MOON! 😂😂
I’ve made the SHORTLIST guys!


Just got a loveliful email from the LITTLEWOODS IRELAND BLOG AWARDS  to tell me that I’ve been shortlisted in BOTH of the categories I’m in! 

Best Parenting Blog & Best Blog Post for my “I am Shake-a-bootay Mum” post.
I am so fricken excited!
What a crazy week it’s been.
  Public voting opens tomorrow until the 23rd.  I’ll figure out the details once I get Snottery-arse and Soaked-in-mud to their beds!
Thank you all for liking and reading my S-mumblings so far.😲

  I’m glad that it’s not just my Mammy who enjoys them, (even though I’m sure she sometimes cringes in mortification!)

Anybuts, did I tell you I’ve been SHORTLISTED?!

Shortlisted AND published in the same week!

I should have entered the RoseyTralee…that could have been my Number 3 win this week! 😅
I’m excited.
Are you excited?
Should we have bubbles to celebrate?

It has to be in those terms & conditions somewhere?
I wonder would Littlewoods sponsor me some new bubbles and grapejuice glasses?
Oh my! 
I am Shortlisted Mum. 😘😘😘
#SMum #LWIBloggies2016 #Shortlisted